My Testimony: Why I Stepped Away From Turn Up Dance Fitness

How It Started

Seventeen years ago, after my son was born, I stepped into the world of dance fitness. I was a mother, a wife, and a soldier in the Army, and I loved every one of those roles. But they carried a lot of responsibility, and they were hard. Somewhere in the middle of it all, I stopped feeling like Tamika.

I needed something for me. If I'm being honest, what I really needed was more of God. Instead, I found dance, and through it I found community. For me, that has always been ministry. No matter what you're walking through, you can come together, put the music on, and dance.

The Community I Built

I built community through genuine connections, not to be popular, but because I knew who God was calling me to be, and I knew He placed certain people in my life for that. Community is my life purpose. I live it in my workplace, in my business, and in any room I walk into. I still fail on a regular basis, and that's okay, because holding ourselves accountable and changing our behavior is what builds my respect for people.

In the beginning, I was part of a different dance fitness format. When I was stationed in upstate New York, there wasn't much diversity and there weren't many opportunities for the dance fitness community, so I set out to build the space I wanted to see. I brought in my friends, who are incredibly talented, to share their excellence and their ability to breathe life into people. Many people came together at those events to connect. Because of who I serve, I walk in the peace that surpasses all understanding (Philippians 4:7).

Along the way, my love of photography grew. I'm self-taught, it hasn't always been perfect, and I'm still learning as a creative, especially in the space of video content. That format later paid me to photograph their conventions and events, and those friendships I cherish forever. Eventually, the friends I had been celebrating and collaborating with were not being treated well. I have a high justice meter, and there's only so long I can stand it. So that chapter ended. I'm not going to get into it, and I don't regret any of it.

Opportunities Come From God, and the Enemy Uses Them Too

Let me be very clear: some of the opportunities that came to me, I never searched for. They came because of God. I didn't even feel worthy, as a creative, of some of the work I was asked to do.

But I also have to admit that not every opportunity is from God. Please don't get it twisted: the enemy uses opportunities too, as a false sense of hope, to distract you from your purpose. I'm not always certain which is which.

I know that regardless, God will use it for His will.

A Word From God

While I was doing that work, the founder of Turn Up saw me in my element, as a creative doing what I do. When I first met her, God gave me a word to share with her. As strange as that may sound, I know when the Holy Spirit is speaking to me, and I obeyed.

He told me He was going to bless her with something, and that she was to steward it well.

That word came before the blessing ever did (Luke 12:48).

The Agreement in 2019

In 2019, she invited me to come alongside Turn Up. I already had my own photography business, so I gave her my rate. She told me she couldn't pay it because she was just starting out. She shared the mission, women's empowerment, and I agreed to a lesser rate because of that mission. The EMPTY Promise - that once the business made a profit, I would be paid my original rate.

I said yes under one condition: if it ever stopped aligning with my values, I would not be able to stay.

Today, Turn Up has grown, there are funds, and my rates haven't changed. Along the way, I learned that others weren't being paid fairly or treated well, and I advocated for them directly to the founder. What I failed to do was advocate for myself, and I own that. When I finally did try, I was met with deflection, avoidance, and no accountability.

Where I Fell Short

I wish I could say I held to my condition right away, but I didn't. Over the years, there were things I didn't agree with as a Christian, and I compromised on what I said I wouldn't.

If I’m truly honest and I’m sure she agrees…I should have left a long time ago, and I'm sorry to my Savior for the moments I lost a little of myself.

My Rebellion

Let me be clear. At the conference in 2025, when I stood up and spoke God's name, that was intentional. In that moment, God told me I could not come back, and that He was not in the space. I prayed with some of you afterward, and I still knew I couldn't come back. The 1st day… I knew. A conversation backstage that I’m sure to many seemed small… was a reminder that I can’t choose two masters.

But I wanted to. I didn't want to leave the community, and I thought I was doing something good, even when things around me weren't spiritually aligned. So I did not walk in full obedience. Instead, I gave her this year, 2026, as an opportunity.

I don't do social media drama. That is not who I am. Matthew 18:15 says that when there is an offense, we go to the person directly, and that is what I did. But when someone disregards it, or feels that sharing my name on social media counts as an opportunity instead of paying me for my services, I have to be honest about where that leaves me... I gave seven years of effort, and the numbers don't align.

But it's not even about the money. It's about the treatment of the community that was built, and it not being stewarded well. I am not motivated by world possessions.. I’m motivated by purpose driven work. I have done many things for the sake of sharing the gifts God gave me. I can be the ultimate cheerleader, and I may have hyped up some things I should have questioned. I own that. But here we are, and I can't co-sign a direct disregard for people and for empathy.

Why I'm Left

One thing is certain about God: He will keep giving me the lesson, and He'll make it really hard to stay in rebellion (Hebrews 12:6).

Today, I'm coming out of rebellion and into obedience.

I'm not leaving to tear anyone down. I'm leaving because God is leading me.

Some of you asked me directly what was happening, especially around the 2026 conference, which I was not at. Out of respect, and out of obedience to God, I stayed silent. After I gave much grace, a full explanation as to my thoughts on the business issues… Tanci made the decision that I should have made for myself. As many of you can see, a lot has been happening behind the scenes. There are things I've chosen not to say, so I don't affect anyone else's experience, because I truly understand that for some of you this community is life-changing. What I do implore you to do is use discernment, and do not idolize people.

To the Founder

I'm speaking directly to you. God told you to steward the blessing He was going to give you, and He told you before He ever gave it. I implore you to study what stewardship really is, because this isn't it.

I love you because Christ calls me to love you. I've poured so much into this format, and into YOU, hoping you would see that God is in all of us, even when we reject Him. Please don't mistake grace for acceptance or bowing down to Queen Tanci (because “these Bitc… pay me as you so eloquently stated). Romans 6 asks if we should keep sinning so grace can increase, and the answer is absolutely not. Additionally, please stop using God as a marketing tool when the actions don't reflect Him, and stop opening doors to the enemy. Please understand that this method is using my spiritual wisdom… I’m trying my absolute best to not respond to you in my fleshly sense. Writing it down always helps for me… it takes the perspective to the another level. Also I’m not crying on the internet about my poor decision to support poor character. Try and control your peeps who want to advocate on your behalf as today was THE DAY because… one of em decided to bully someone for speaking their truth. Pleassssssseeeeeeeeeee don’t activate the release of evidence you KNOW I hold of the true character… my fleshly part would have fun. I recommend that you be LED by the ACTUAL CREATOR/MASTER before offering “mastermind education” to the community you don’t truly see for their value. My spirit is tired but I know the true MASTER and we can only have #1.

I don't want this to be the end of Turn Up. Let this be a turnaround. Let it be you finding true direction, and an opportunity for God to turn up your spiritual ears and your heart. It is the end of many of our relationships with Turn Up, because our values don't align and THIS TOO SHALL PASS.

My disappointment isn't only in what's happening. It's really in myself, because I didn't hold myself accountable in the moments I knew I should have. I'm hurt, and I'm going to let that hurt lead me to make the changes I need to make. I pray you do the same.

To the Community

I know many of you are hurting for different reasons, and I'm not taking that away from you. I'm sorry that so many of you are hurt, including in some of the collaborations had, and I'm sorry to anyone I hurt by staying quiet when you wanted clarity with words that should have been spoken. For every season, there is a reason and I’m grateful for the opportunity to connect with EACH OF YOU!

I will always call for forgiveness. Colossians 3:13 says to forgive as the Lord forgave us. Forgiveness isn't for the person who may have caused the harm, whether it was intentional or not. It's for us, because it's what God calls us to do, and we can all be redeemed. I keep my connections because God calls me to be connected to them.

In entrepreneurship, we choose to collaborate, and it matters that we collaborate with purpose. When God introduces someone in my life, I watch the fruit and we all fall short but GOD RESTORES PURPOSE. That purpose shouldn't be just money, clout, popularity, or likes. It should be about stewarding the blessings well and passing them on to others. Positivity is a domino effect, and so is negativity. That's why I'm calling you to heal.

Allow God to heal you, and be led by the true source.

The True Source Is God

Not a person, not a place, not a dance, not a format, not the music, not tarot cards, not psychics, not witchcraft.

There is always better, there is always more, and there is always a reason to choose joy. The world is chaotic, and I just wanted to make a small impact where I could. That doesn't stop. My doors are open, and my love for you is the same.

Thank you for letting me be part of your journey. I love you, and God bless you.

Tamika LaJoyce